I have been told that I write like a tall blonde, so that's how I'd like you to picture me.

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I've published six novels, the most recent of which came out in January 2022. I've also published two non-fiction books, about The Archers and Shakespeare (that's two separate books, not one weird mash-up).
 

Before writing books, I did a lot of different jobs. I worked in schools, shops, offices, hospitals, students' unions, basements, from home, in my car, and up a tree. OK, not up a tree. I've been a sexual health trainer, a journalist, a psychology lecturer, a PhD student, a lousy alcohol counsellor, and an inept audio-typist. I sold pens, bread, and condoms. Not in the same shop. I taught parents how to tell if their teenagers are taking drugs (clue: they act like teenagers), and taught teenagers how to put on condoms (clue: there won't really be a cucumber). I taught rabbis how to tell if their teenagers are druggedly putting condoms on cucumbers.

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Throughout this, I always wrote, and always drank a lot of tea. I'm now pretty much unbeatable at drinking tea.